my name is J-A-M-Y! idiot you!

guess wut..? i find that there is something bothering me for a long long time.. it's juz dat i really had enuff of this... every single time.. yes, every single time i say my name through the phone, the other person seems to be getting the wrong name. instead of Jamy, they will go "jenny arr? ms. jenny?"
i had to repeat at least twice for them to get my name rite.. and sometimes, those buggers still couldn't get it rite after i spelled it out! fuck it.
is there something wrong wif my beautiful voice or are they deaf or wut? stupid idiot! i bet they never clean their ears and it's full of shit! grrrr...

X: ur name please, ma'am?
me: jamy. my name is jamy."
X: jenny? okie, ms. jenny.
me: no, it's jamy. my name is jamy.
X: yes, ms. jenny...
me: JAMY! J-A-M-Y!! got it?
X: ohh.. sorry. okie, ms. jany, we will fax you the invoice by 2day..
me: !! &%*#&^(&%(*#$!

going on

tiz pic somehow still brings me some memories of warm feeling..so warm, so delicious..

it still lingers on my mind.. but really, things are better left as it is, at least.. i had it before..

i do not care.

i'm still going on. am waiting for a better day.

luna.luna

uhuhh... ages since the last entry.. but WTF.. was damn lazy, as alwiz..to update... *yawnnn*... *strettttttccccchhhhhh....*
normal larr, after on leave for a freaking week.. apparently, after a week of slacking days, my mind had somewhat evolved into a retarded condition.. my limbs moving in slow action all the time.. was in hell going back to work the last few days.. but anyway, no sweat.. will be having another week-long holiday in September.. *weehee*

went to LUNA BAR twice during my leave.. wif seipo PP and her 'chubby pie'. and Ling. and Summer Angel. Fantastic atmosphere there, i like their concept of having window seats wif full length glass, overlooking KL skyline, speaking of which, strongly recommended for hopeless romantic couples. A heavenly place for ur date as these window seats have a kinda secluded setting..better be early if you wanna grab one of those seats, very limited. They have a swimming pool in the middle of the bar. Love their pool, which is cool if you are filthy rich enuff to take up the whole bar for ur evening pool party wif ur frens.. this place is actually the hotel's pool by day for in-house guests, and they turn it down into a so-called lounge bar for public patrons in the evening. Overall, a good place for hanging out wif buddies for a few drinks. Cover charge is only for Friday and Saturday nites. RM50 per pax. Yes, ladies need to pay as well. Either that, or the other option of opening a bottle of liquor. One bottle, admission for 4 pax.
Okie, enuff bout LUNA..

i'm off to read Kenny Sia now..am tracking back all his previous postings everyNITE! yes.. i'm addicted! addicted! [ADDICTED]

ps: discovered something really good from Kenny's blog---> the one and only "Cantonese Blog"! yea.. check it out (only if you understand cantonese): Jut Doi Siong Diu <--- they are really hou lan ying!

Sincerely yours...

Sincerity. I think most ppl can feel the sincerity of a certain individual by the way they talk, their physical actions as well as eye contact. And now, you can even sense a person's sincerity by the way they type their keyboard. And with these senses of the sincerity level displayed by a certain person, it is actually a cue for you to decide, or giving you an idea more likely, that, will things work out to be what you think or hope it might be wif this specific individual? It's a little bit confusing here, but I will try my best to elaborate what i mean here wif the sample below:

The Scenario:
For, let's say.. okie, imagine you got 2 friends, X & Y. Both are in similar position, your friends. One fine day, all three of you were chatting wif each other in whatever chatroom. In ur mind, you knew that you are only interested to chat wif X (reason[s] being, up to your imagination). So, when X popped up, you started to pent up with excitement and thinking what would strike a good conversation from there. Okie, so you finally did get something up to start a line, hoping that it will turn into an prominent conversation. But alas, you realized in a while that eventually, you did the talking, i mean, typing more than what X replied most of the time during the chatz.. and it did make you wonder, is X really that interested chatting with you? or is X juz being nice and for the sake of manners, trying to entertain you with a few words in reply to the things that you said? and somehow, you knew that YOU were the one that was trying very hard to get X to say something, by throwing open-ended questions. Everytime.

The Conversation:
YOU: so, did you manage to catch the show last nite?
X: yea, i did. u?
YOU: uhhuh, yupe. dat was real funny. i was laughing non-stop. don't you think dat whatever-the-name is damn hilarious?
X: so-so, could be better.
YOU: (starting to run out thing to say) oh yea? y u say so? i think he's okie.
X: nahh.. juz think it's not that funny.
YOU: (really starting to run out of topic) ohhh.. i see. so, not going out tonite?
X: yea, later. maybe out for dinner wif friends.
YOU: (totally blank now) ohh.. where u having ur dinner wif ur friends?
X: somewhere near my place. hey, tell u wut, wanna take my shower. chat later yea. bye.

(X appears to be offline. Messages that you send will be delivered when they sign-in.)

*****
okie, that's the end of your conversation wif X. got wut i mean? (oh yea, it normally took X an average of 5 mins to make a reply)

On the other hand, however, Y was also online. But you didn't feel like chatting up so you juz pretended to be idle. But Y juz dropped you a line. So there's nothing you could do, so you juz replied Y wif a simple "hie". Y kept trying to chat up a conversation wif you. ---- And so, please refer to the above The Conversation. Juz change the role of YOU to Y; X to YOU.

(YOU appears to be offline. Messages that you send will be delivered when they sign-in)

P/S: YOU actually did not sign-out. YOU blocked Y.

Fight In Full Action = FIFA - Legendry Francais v. Hot Bod Italianos

so.. Francais lost it and the Italianos is jumping up and down now with the trophy.

Spectated the whole match, was supporting the Italians but badly wanted the Frenchie to win, ironically. My saliva kept on drooling (now still drooling) during the whole match, damn those Italianos looking so good.. basically lurrrrvvvesss everyone of the Italian players (special attention to Totti, Camoranesi, Grosso and Zambrota.. too bad Inzaghi and Maldini was not playing, BOO!) But i was really hoping France would win!
That's becuz, besides a supporter for Asian team, i'm a fan of Zizou, i don care wut others said of him, and yes, he's bald, as a matter of fact.. but i kinda find him a terrific player despite he is botak. I might be a fanatic for leng chai players, but i still take into consideration of the skills (ball skills. FOOTball skills) and i was hoping France could grab the title again so that Zizou could end his career with pride. Yes, i was disappointed that France couldn't make it, and they could have performed better, and Zizou could have been conscious enuff to know better than to butt his head into Materazzi's chest! That was fucking ridiculous.. and darn FUNNY! was laughing till my stomach nearly burst when i saw that..wahahaha..
yea, yea..he shouldn't have done that, but i think it must really be something that came out of Materazzi's mouth which provoked Zidane's anger to the max limits. but watever, i still think Zizou as a great player and it's true, France should thank him for it. If it's not for him, think the Francais will make it to the final?

but i do agree, the Italians played very well last nite. Very pro. They deserves the victory.

No sweat Zizou, you are still a legend to the football world. You will remain as a legend de la France.

my all time "temper-venting" machine

i realized that whenever i thought of submiting a new post for the blog... it must be something that i need to complaint about, either something that pissed me off or something that i have doubts onto.. juz something not good.

really trying hard to make my life satisfiable, however, things juz ain't right for me.. whenever things started to look good, there are always other matters that came barging in, which makes me fretful, pissed and irritated. and that's a bad day.. and that is why, i find that the current "best song of the moment" is Daniel Powter's BAD DAY.. daily dose of listening..

like the other day, i woke up wif a smiley face, opened my eyes to the brightest sunshine, feeling glorious over a good nite sleep, wif the sweetest dream ever.. and i was in a sing-song mood, preparing myself for work... the day looked so promising and beautiful, until - i reached the junction outside my house! was driving my car and waiting for the right moment to turn into the highway, waiting and waiting (there was extremely lot's of car along the highway, which made it real difficult even get out from the junction, unless you don't mind ppl blaring their horns and/or showing the international finger sign at you, you may juz make the turn without bother, AND if u know how KL's ppl driving skill, u will noe wut i mean here)..
okie, back to the junction part, i was still waiting and eventually i spotted my chance to make the turning.. thinking, "yes, after this car.." this car was moderate in speed, so i assumed better to let it pass before i make my move.. sekali, when he reached the junction, he turned in! without the SIGNAL, dammit! can't the bastard driver juz TURN ON the damn signal so that i don hav to wait for his lanjiao car to pass before making my turning?! and it's not the 1st time i encounter such retarded drivers on the road.. many many times! many many times! i juz wonder if they are handicap drivers or if their hands will experience epilapsy just when they should put on the signal light, if not, is turning on the damn signal such a burden for them? if it is, JUZ DON'T DRIVE IF YOU ARE RETARDED! ......retarded bastard! hmmmmmppphhh!
Becuz of this bastard car incident, my whole day was spoilt! it set me on fire and everything that looked so beautiful when i woke up, was gone.. shadowed by this freaking driver! i know, it's my temper, and i shouldn't sweat over the small stuff, but it's juz get on ur nerves.. fuck it! fuck it! grrrr...

see, that's wut i meant when i said everytime i thought of my blog, it would be some irritations and nerves-wrecking things that i need to shout out!.. i beginning to think that my blog is my temper-venting machine.. so sad huh..
sorry blog, i know i should treat you anything better than this.. =(

okie, i think i should juz make it a point to list down good things/happy thoughts everytime i make a posting. even simple things..it sounds a little frivolous, but i hope it will help. hey, at least i try, hor? okie, here goes --


uplifted my mood for the past week:

• had cuppas wif michelle on monday nite, our gossiping session went well.
• had more cuppas wif michelle the following day. gossiping session went well. bought a dolly cardigan at Queen's Park. nicey.
• bought a new webcam and a new headphone wif mic. will keep me entertained for a while.
• dayna sent me a URL of a blog posting, and that's how i discovered the ever superb blog site of kennysia.com (sorry, i didnt realize before that he got famous from blogging and even received the Asian Blogger Award. (okie, i am clueless about blogging world.) - i juz love reading his blog! simple, funny, true and no excessive word jargon! juz love it!
• kimberly bought me lunch on Friday at Bangsar Chatterbox. our gossiping session went well.
• a regular customer treated me few glasses of Chateau Potensac 1996. thumbs up.
• signed and forwarded online petition for SPCA. happy!
• good sales yesterday. many many many ppl bought many many many wines. good.

okie, quite a massive accumulation of niceties for the past week. double thumbs up.

P/S: alrite, our Asian reps for worldcup, namely Japan and Korea couldn't make it through, but they did a good job! they put all the efforts they could give! they are still BIG players!

am ur friend?

been busying my damn ass off for the past week....

okie okie... it's actually my laziness that prevented me from updating, i admit..haha..

supposingly i should be having cuppas wif dearie PP 2nite but she gave me a call late tiz afternoon and asking me whether if i''ll be willing to join her and another colleague of hers for wines later in the evening.. and eventually, this li'l wine party would be at my competitor's wine bar (how ironic, i'll be having wine party at my competitor's place whereby i should hav suggested to have them gather up at the restaurant nex to my wine shop!), one of our buddy are currently working there (meaning, my buddy = my competitor! HAHA!) , and he's offered to treat us a nice bottle.. so there.. should i decline? of cuz not! ended up, we decided to give it a go, as deearie PP's colleague (namely Summer Angel..hehe) was supposed to meet with her Spanish net friend at Oasis after our wine party.. so that's our plan.. to have a bottle of wine at "D****O" b4 heading to the Oasis to meet up wif the Spanish guy..

i headed straight to "D****O" after i finished work, selected the bottle and sat there, waited for dearie PP and her frens for an hour! reason: they lost their way..oh my.. when they arrived, it's almost 11.30pm..

okie.. we finished the whole bottle and then wut? we went to Oasis to meet Summer Angel's Spanish guy but when we reached there, guess wut? He's actually ready to take leave and heading towards "the Loft" with his frens.. WTF.. we wanted to join him..but 3 of us gotta work 2moro..(plus, i was not dressed up!).. then wut? Summer Angel made up her mind to let him go and they made some promises to meet up again.. so at last, we settled ourselves for another jug of beer at the Oasis.. better than nothing larr..

something had been triggering my thoughts lately, and it's about net friendship... i believe most of net surfer's freak like us should have befriended some online friends, be it the same sex or the opposite... but how many of them have you actually met before? and should it be advisable to meet with someone that you got to know through internet chat room? or MSn or ICQ? or wutever... ? is it trustable? this has been the cheesy topic that me and dearie PP had been discussing about lately.. she had been thinking about meeting up wif one of her net fren and i'm encouraging her to go for it.. wut harm will it do anyway, wif meeting up wif ur net fren, over a cuppa, rite? like wut i've seen Summer Angel 2nite, she got her guts to meet up wif her Spanish net guy for the first time, and yes, she's nervous..but she did it.. and she's happy bout it! and it's satifying to see her excitement.. becuz she really deserves it.. she got the gutsy power..
me? errrrmmmm... i don't think i could it.. uhh-uhh.. not me.. it worries me when i think of it.. one thing that's bugging me the most is ... the first impression.. first appearance.... my appearance, to be honest... come to think of it, i'm worried of wut the other party would think of me for the first time.. will they see the real me to be very different from the me they knew on the net, comparatively? and would they be disappointed when i'm not wut they expected me to be? yes, it's true that we saw each other pic beforehand, but things might turn out to be wrong from each other expectations.. and then wut? will be stucked in a real awkward and somewhat, embarassing situation then, won't i?
that's wut i think.. i may be wrong, i'm not sure.. anyways..

okie.. am getting off now..am tired.. am drunk.. am gonna sleep now.. ciao!

GOAL!!

AHN Jung-Hwan & LEE Chun-soo: credits goes to them for the Korean team's victory!

GOAL! Korea Kicks! yea.. juz finished watching the match between Kor v. Tog.. was able to perform my little victory dance in full throttle for Korea! it was a good match.. after the losing of Japan to the Aussie team yesterday, Korea am capable to bring up the "chi" for us Asian! we may not be able to be the BIG winner for the Worldcup at the moment, but at least we proved to the world that Asian are BIG players too! let's hope Japan will make it for their coming match on the 18th..way to go!

Victory with you, Japan...GANBADE!!!!

the match today of Japan vs. Australia was really disappointing! the first half was excellent wif Japan scoring their 1st goal by Nakamura..(thousands of the blue team's fans screamed their heads off in the arena!) i was shouting wif joy and doing the victory dance when the Japan team hit their goal! Kawaguchi Yoshikatsu -- he's the best goal keeper ever, had been his admirer since the worldcup in 1998.. his performance just now was outstanding, managed to defence all the goal attempts from the Aussies.. untill, the second half kicked in.. well.. all i would say was a bit of luck for the Aussies, with their scoring of 3 goals in the last 8 mins.. WTF.. too bad for the Nihon team!
nevermind that, Japan team, we go by you! Victory to you for the next match on the 18th! GANBADE ne! (especially to Kawaguchi, he's juz damn gorgeaous, ain't he..sigh...)

<--Japan team with Kawaguchi leading the team..
the 1st goal -->
















<--- Kawaguchi in action.. sigh..luv him!

好想你！

with regard to my previous post, my mood is on the lower scale, turning downhill minutes by minutes.. but then, i was chatting with one of my dearest ji mui last nite.. she's my most precious darling, which is currently working in Swiss.. ohhh.. how i missed her..! i've been feeling so pathetic lately and seeing her popped up in my MSN has made me nearly burst into tears.. we managed only to chat for half an hour as it was almost 3.30am when she went online and i am supposed to work the next day.. but i didnt care and we ended up chatting till the wee hours of 4.30am!

i felt so much better after chatting wif her..she has been one of the most supportive person in my life, she has given me the bestest friendship i could ask for! apparently, she will be coming back to KL in July! although it will juz be a 2 weeks holidayz for her, it meant a millions worth of joy for me.. i can't wait to see her again..
we will be going out and have funs together again.. going places, yum cha, lovely bi-atching sessions, trying to catch things up wif each other again.. i miss her so much! hope i can see her real soon.. i miss you my darling! luv ya to the max!

the consequence: overslept and late for work.. lucky me my boss was not around.. =þ
ermm..or maybe i should spend less time blogging till late into the nite..

学这。。。

down.. i feel so down for the whole week. i dunno why.. but i'm feeling very lonely..
had had lunch wif one of my ex-lecturer on Wednesday.. that was good, since he gave some sort of new inspirations to my perspective on LIFE...

i feel sorta losing self confidence day by day, and i'm really afraid.. it scared the hell out of me.. cuz tiz is the least that i could feel insufficient during the years in college.... i was bold, i was egoistic, i used to walk wif head held high, each step taken wif pride..
and now, i walk wif my head looking down, quicken my steps most of the time juz to reach the destination sooner so that i could be as invisible as possible.. not noticeable at all.. hoping that i could be blend into the surroundings.. couldn't be seen.. by other passers-by.. imagine, one of my regular customer who alwiz sees me at VC, asked me the other day, why i'm alwiz walking like yeepa-yeepa-speedy gonzales, wif the head hung low.. never lifted my head even once..
i juz smiled at him and said, "that's me"..
so speaking, i don't understand why i became the person that i am now, i do not know how to analyse anymore, i juz feel so tired.. to make matter worse, i start comparing other ppl with myself.. i compared myself, of wut i have achieved right now, with wut those of my friends, ex-classmates, ex-colleagues, basically everyone around.. possesed. Some how or rather, i find that, they are sure to have succeeded something that is better than me... be it their career, their monthly income, their relationship..or .. whatsoever..
it pricks me real hard when i realized that there is still so much more that i have left out in my life.. things that still yet to be in my possession, things that still yet to be achieved, dreams that are yet to materialize...by me. so you see, that worsen my now already chaotic situation..

but since the lunch session wif my ex-lecturer, it does seems to help cheering me up a bit, things that he told me seems to be working its way into my head,and it's telling me that i could actually do more than i believe i could... that it's the journey that counts, not the destiny.. there will be never be an end, if there isn't any commencing point. this has left much for me to ponder upon..hmmm...i understand that i am in a journey now... and it's no easy path ahead.. but that doesn't refrain me from taking another step on.. all i need is a li'l support..from dear ones, and that is a thing that never lacks in my life..not now, not ever..

therefore: i am learning all over again. soon, i will likely to summon back all my confidence, my self-worth, my self-prospect and most of all, my attitude!
next time around, i will walk holding my head high, nose upright and wif pride. again.

我也不想这样。。。

all of a sudden, i feel damn bored~! not that i had been leading an exciting life for the past few years..life has been monotonous since the end of my tertiery education, a.k.a = when working life budged in!

okie, maybe i hadn't notice it right away due to all the excitement i was experiencing in coping myself for the real adulthood, independence and purely, the responsibility of having my own life.. now, after 3 years of struggling, i managed to have a secured job, in a so-so company, with a so-so monthly income that's enuff for my car monthly instalment, credit card debts and living expences (which is getting more and more freakingly unmanageable!!)...the left-over, barely 'nuff for me to survive on shopping spree and regular beauty regimen, don't even mention about savings!

in the midst of financial desperation, i realized lately that besides working, i don't have much entertainment.. not much enjoyment, i would say..
besides having cuppas (bi-atching session, literally speaking..) with my close buddies, there's isn't much more to tell about my life.. work work work, cuppas cuppas cuppas... sleep sleep sleep, work work work, cuppas cuppas cuppas..
no dates, no quality of life, nothing...

i'm a totally different 'Jamy' now compared to the 'Jamy' during the college dayz..okie, i know it's kinda ridiculous to make comparison between then and now, since i was so young during those times (not that i'm croaked-bone-old by now) and that life should mellow down a bit as you grow older but; hey..i'm still in my 20's, for God sake! and i've gone through half of my 20's now, imagine, another 5 damn years and i'll hit the big "three O"... tsk*tsk*.. and i'm still sitting here, updating my blog while i should be out there having all the fun that girls in their 20's should be having..partying like craze, playing big time, flirting, seeing the worlds 'round.. but instead.. i've been staying at home, moping around and doing nothing, juz zZzZZz for the weekends.. me feeling like a slob!

help needed! i'm dying to get a life! dying to get something for me to obssess about.. dying to get to do wut i should be doing in my peak time! dying to get back my confidence...

i need something i can look forward to..in life!

feeling rite now: 觉得生活很空白。。。

Merril Bainbridge: The Garden

this is one of my favs album during my teen days.. but i lost this cd some time ago and i dunno where it went! boohoo!

but thanks to www.limewire.com , am able to download all the songs from that album. I really like Merril's songs but it's so unfortunate that she couldn't make it big time after her first album! shame on that. Hope she will emerge to fame again soon!

Wonders..

The black images are actually the shadows.. the white ones are the real camels. This picture was taken from upper view down..

One of my friend forwarded this pic to me.. it's way too cool! I... appreciates world wonders.. do you?

(click for a larger view of image)

missing...from my MSN =(

I had been waiting for "someone" to pop up in my MSN.. and it had been days since we last chatted.. everytime I waited for this "someone" to say something 1st.. and apparently, this "someone" didn't. And when I finally managed to gather up all my nerves to say 'Hi".. this "someone" went offline.. sob*sob.. I'm so pathetic..

Had not been seeing this "someone" online since yesterday, and already, I'm feeling not rite.. my god, I'm going nuts, if not out of my mind.. one way or the other!

Pure Disguise, spells: D.I.S.G.U.S.T.I.N.G.

I have recently discovered that there are some ppl who like to avoid, or I might say, deny their own past.. or their origin.. or who they really are... wutever you might call it...

It seems to these ppl that they finally achieved wut they wanted to be all along.. a high class socielite, with the right kind of trendy lifestyle and mingling with the ever "IN" groups of friend.. oh my, they think they are..

And in the process of achieving this life-long dream... they forget who they are... some tries too hard, some lied and some.. well, some of them juz made up stories to allow themselves to be recognized as a well-behaved, well-mannered and well-groomed persona! And talking about personality.. they like to brag.. to show-offs, literally... and for the purpose of what? To upgrade their reputation, of course! heaven forbid!

They despise ppl and things from the past that might bring shame or might disrepute their "flawless" image and will start using their camouflage skills to shade themselves, for instance, disregard his/her own alma mater just because it happens to be not a famous international institution.. Or maybe even avoiding speaking of the ex-classmates/schoolmates in front of those "always-with-great-achievements-and-we-are-the-best" groups of friends, so that these ppl won't have a clue that he/she grew up with such individuals from such disreputable school..On the contrary, will alwiz refer this him/her as a petty cute li'l étudiente de l'école populaire! And so speaking, that's where all the lies started..

It's amazing that I happened to discovered one of these ppl is someone I knew from my schooling days.. haha.. so much for the efforts to make up for her image, I am here to uncover her true self, to burst her bubbles, to tell the truth and nothing but the truth of her disguise.. I am undercover PC520...

Conclusion: be who u are.. one must not be ashamed of ur past.. it doesn't matter where a person came from, it's the heart and sincerity that matters the most.. do not look down on others, they may not seem to be good enuff for you, but you're never sure if you are good enuff urself..

Vinexpo Hong Kong

With Noelle @ Gunderloch booth, Vinexpo HK

View from my room, Majestic Hotel, Nathan Rd. Kowloon

Vinexpo Hong Kong 2006 (22-25 May)

Gosh.. been ages since the last entry... it was a real damn hectic period for the past month! Had had a Spanish wine dinner function on the 20th of May, and Italian wine dinner on the 30th and had had another Italian wine reception 2 days ago..! freakin' damn tired to the bones! =(

In between, I was lucky enuff to be at the Vinexpo 2006, Hong Kong (22nd - 25th May) with my asst. manager and another regular customer of ours.. well, there wasn't much time for my shoppping spree, but still... I managed to grab some great stuffs from the trip... hehe.. wut else is there to do in HK besides eating and shopping.. huh? tell me..

Things grabbed: clothes! shoes! bags! Yuen Long "Lou Poh Beng"and aji ichiban munchies from HKIA b4 boarding the flight back to KL.. haha!





Best things eaten: Steamed egg whites with double layered milk skin (my favs..) Pineapple bun.. Curry fishballs! Beef noddles.. Baked Lobsters in Lamma Island... Braised Pork from the chinese restaurant in Conrad Hotel.

Consequences from the trip: Was down with flu and sore throat... *duhh**

Anyways, it was an awesome trip.. Will plan another personal holiday there again soon for another shopping rendez-vous!

I Can't Thank You Enuff

Seeing is believing.. but sometimes, "HEARING" does make you believe too! What if, one day, someone happens to play "saw and tell" and eventually told you something that you would rather not know at all..? It's true that the truth is always the best alternative among alternatives, the best choice among the many choices..to bug someone back to cruel reliazation. And the realization, despite the bitterness it will bring, is just what needed here.. especially if you are being cheated, deceited and by all means, betrayed!

I can tell you, here and now, the bitterness is beyond ur imagination! You happened to know someone apparently had been breaking promisses, and you got to know it from another person.. and worst still, you confronted the bastard "someone" and that "someone" confessed that it's true, he had been doing just that behind your back, admited his betrayal.
Ohhhhh.... how it hurts, how stupid, how naiive, how frustrated you were when you heard all this confession... you shouted back at him, you cried and you stammered out all your anger in one whole breath.. and yes, he did make apology but you didn't even sense any sincerity in his apology, not to mention the feeling of asking for your forgiveness! "Forget it, I apologized, you heard it alrite, case settled, it's over.." is what seems like he was thinking when he said the word "sorry"..

Well, let me tell you, betrayer+promise breaker+jerk, you hurt me great, hurt me bad and most of all, you break my heart! Ur apology is accepted BUT you are not forgiven! Thanks to you, I will remember for my whole life, what a real jerk you are! And thanks to you, I learn now that I will never ever trust a single promise anyone make! And thanks to you, you are my biggest mistake that I ever trusted!

And as a token of my appreciation, take this, jerk:

FUCK YOU!

blogging is easy.. finding a competent blogging site is the challenge...

changing blog once again... i find that blogger's still the best site for blogging.. no limitation to photo upload and it's totally free without prompting you to upgrade ur account due to limited space for your free accounts..talk about competency.. *duhhh*chill...

Redang Island, Laguna Beach Resort 01/04/2006 - 03/04/2006

White Sandy Beaches.. crystal clear water...
Green and Blue Marine Sea

My dear blog...
A long long long long time since the last time i made the last entry... not that I'm lazy.. but I can't seem to find the time! I've been packed by work for the last few weeks.. mostly becuz there's much much more to do now.. and new associates are being recruited last month.. phewwwww...... it's really energy-consuming to train them.. especially if they are not the *bright* type..younoewarramean? But fortunately, at least majority of them are able to catch things up pretty fast..except one *tut* It's really irritating when one can't even perform or understand the simplest of things.. it's really nerve-wrecking... AAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!
Okie.. 'nuff bout my office.. 'nuff.. or else i couldn't stop talking bout the stupid *tut* that make my hair raised in fury everytime i look at the *tut* face...
I juz had some really awesome time spending my holidayz at Redang Island last week wif my buddies! Frankly.. this is the first time..i see such crystal clear sea...marine blue.. with fancy corals.. beautiful!!! Ohh... the best part is snorkelling! So many fishies surrounding me.. swimming together.. schools & schools of them! Ohh... yes.. we even saw 5 sea turtles, it's totally breathtaking.. it's so rare nowadays to see turtles..and we saw 5 of them in a row! Cool! And what's more.. maybe if i said it out, you ppl will laugh at me.. but i flew a kite on the beach! I never fly any kite before in my entire life.. not even when i was a child.. this is my very first time..so imagine.. the excitement.. feeling so good!

It's a paradise.. the view.. the scenery... the sea... the air... oh yeah... and the body massage theraphy.. and the foot reflexology.. such a long time since I last tasted such luxuries.. hmmmm...
The holidayz had really done me good!..i really feel rejuvenated.. all troubling thoughts were heal..(well, at least for a while..) and ohhh.. watching the starry night sky on the beach at nite was so cool! So pleasant... so relaxing...
The drawbacks: Tanned skin! *duhh*... burnt shoulders and nose...bloated stomach from too much food!
Bonus point: We met a cute beach boy... it's enuff that we could feast our eyes on him... he's juz way too cool..! especially his great tanned skin... eeeewwwww...! Nihon feel!
Recommended Accomodation: Laguna Redang Beach Resort or Redang Beach Resort

Posted at Saturday, April 08, 2006





Paradise.. made in Heaven... Redang Island 01/04/2006 - 03/04/2006...

Left & Right .... .. Laguna Lobby


after body massage therapy...and foot reflexology...NICE!
Posted at Saturday, April 08, 2006









Paradise.. made in Heaven... Redang Island 01/04/2006 - 03/04/2006...


swimming in the sea..walking on the beach.. all in da beauty of dusk light..




3 in a bunk... did anyone notice the cigar?? OMG.. my face is red like lobster..too much sun and snorkelling.. and it will burn like hell! **sun block? = useless*~*


Posted at Saturday, April 08, 2006













Paradise.. made in Heaven... Redang Island 01/04/2006 - 03/04/2006

read me.. P:A:R:A:D:I:S:E... Redang Island Laguna Beach Resort.. front view.. magnificent!

More More Cha.. ..













bridge leading to Redang Reef...

Summer Point , Redang Beach... fiesta. Period.
On the verandah, Laguna Resort...

Posted at Saturday, April 08, 2006

The Sentiment, Slowly Slipping Away
After a long 'break'...finally, i make it back to have the urge to update my blog again.. it's been quite some time since i have stop writing.. think most prob'ly 3 weeks since my last entry..? hmm.. apparently, lots has happened... for the better or worst, I can't be sure juz yet, at least on my part, not yet..
I'm still in the midst of recovering from the traumatic feelings in me... but it's getting better, the sentiment is slowly diminishing... a good sign, I guess.... good as in, I can really analyse the whole damn thing with sanity.. that this decision taken by J is deem rite... is the ultimate solution...
No blame, No accusation, No regret... as quoted by Alvin, "things happened for the better.." and it's true... J will be happier this way...
J will live better...J, so long.. take care and thanks for everything..

Posted at Tuesday, March 07, 2006





Learn Ur Lesson Well...
It happened... it really did happened.. but not as she wished it could be.. She felt so dejected.. so ashamed.. I couldn't agree more that the word "c.h.e.a.p" is labeled all over her face right now.. others won't see it.. but she feel it anyway...

below is the story of a person I noe:

~**~**~**~
You were drunk..you were lying on his bed.. but he let the other friends to drag you out of his room, out from his house, as fast as they can, the faster the better.. (wut he meant was, telling you to get lost from his sight, even if you strip urself naked, he won't have anything to do wif you..no sex..no sex, wake up.. he's not gonna fuck u, c.h.e.a.p slut!)
Your friends love you so much, they don want u to get urself hurt..so they were good enuff to carry you to the car, drove you to their house and made u drank more, juz to shut u down... but you were stupid enuff to beg them to take you back to this "so-called fantasy-knight in shining armour" guy's place..but they firmly hold you down... to make clear that things aren't supposed to be working that way..that you shud let go and let ur flames die... but you didn't give up.. not that easily.. and so, you did something that no one would believe you will do --- you tried to jump from the balcony juz to get back to the knight in shining armour's place, so that you can be given the chance again to let him fuck you.. (how absurd! this woman is mad, man!)... Your friends couldn't hold you any longer since you dared to get urself out like spiderman clinging from the balcony, so they drove you back to that guy's place...
You were at the front door once again... you were trying to bring your hand to press the doorbell, all the while ur whole body shaking non-stop..u turned ur head and saw ur PP hiding in the corner, giving you a nod of encouragement... "bzzzzzz" --- u pressed, u waited, ur heartbeat rising every second, the sound of it thumping hard against ur eardrums, u heard unsteady footstep, it seems like you were standing there forever and .......'creeeeekkkkk'... the door opened...
It wasn't him.. it wasn't him standing there.. it was ---> his housemate (oh my..)... he was looking at you.. his face suddenly turned white, like he had seen a ghost.. then he finally spoke.. his voice hoarsed..but still managed to croak out how can he help you.. "I'm here for PC.." you stammered...without another word, he strode off to call PC.. and at that particular moment, you panic..and chickened out... "WAIT!", you shouted... that housemate of his turned back, startled... then you said in a voice that you thought it's not audible at all (but that poor guy heard it alrite..), "it's okie..it's okie.. i be going now..i don't need to see him..thanks"... the housemate was looking at you, asking you if you're okie..(but his face was telling you that he's still convincing himself that u r not a ghost..and that he wished you could disappear from his face quick! (can't blame him..it was 530 in the morning, poor guy..) --- when you told him it's okie, he slammed the door shut in less than a second...
You were still blured when you convinced both PP & CH that you are okie.. and that you could drive back safely.. they trusted you and let you go... but you were mad.. you were a crazy drunkard.. you were a moron... you turned back ur car, backed to the place...got down and went up to his place again... (this is really gross..) --- you sent an sms to PP to tell her wut u did and she's damned fed-up wif you already.. she called to PC, hinting to him that you were at his front door.. you were hoping that he would open the door... but u waited...and waited.. and waited.. till you fell asleep...
PP shaking you up from ur sleep.. PP looking at you..you looking up at her wif puffy eyes from excessive crying.........--- "let's go.. he's not going to open the door for you.. he noe u are here.. but he would not open, he told me that himself.. he was telling me to take you away ..and i'm here to bring you home.."
You are not going anywhere..that's wut u told PP.. you will wait and wait till he come out from there... to let him see that you are stupid enuff to sleep in front of his doorstep... how insane you could be when u love someone.... PP couldn't do anything bout you.. she just sat there, looking at you... you were stubborn and tried to make her leave, but in vain.. assuring her that you would be okie lying there... but deep down, you knew it's not...
*~*~*~*~

"Let's have a smoke 1st..before i go..", you said to PP...
at last, PP was able to persuade you to leave his front door..to stop acting stupid..so that you could save ur face..... both of you.. sitting on the playground bench.. a beautiful morning..with birds chirping in the background...the sun trying to emerge from the crack of the clouds...
Another nite of alcohol, smoke,heartbreak and tears had gone... and another sunny day had arrived...
~**~**~**~

We could always make the most out of our lives, if we really want to... to still be suffering after wut has happened is useless... live ur life the way you like, you only live once...you don't need others to tell you wut's ought to do and wut's not..you don't belong to anyone except urself.. do not live a regretful life...
Posted at Monday, February 06, 2006






POWER PHRASE
"Of cuz he should know how to choose..if I'm him, I would surely choose HER..."
It's so powerful, it hurts..but it's the truth..
Posted at Wednesday, January 18, 2006






Standing By The Window

She was sitting at the counter, the monitor blaring in to her face.. giving her attention to the computer screen..
In the midst of her concentration, she was startled by the sound of customer walking into the shop.. she quickly got up and intended to serve the newly walked-in.. but the customer strode off the shop ..
She sat down again and tried to concentrate on the screen?all of a sudden, she sensed a wave, like static, drawing her attention from the screen to the shop entrance.. all in a split second..
There, walking through the entrance---is PC! Omigod, she said to herself, the sudden appearance of PC made her heart jump a beat, blood flushing to her cheeks, hot with passion...

There he was, standing there and smiling at her she felt the urge to rush towards him, to throw her arms around him, to kiss his cute li'l smile..like wut they used to do in Disney fairytales, holding him and never let go.. never..!

She was awaken from her hallucination when he spoke..
Apparently, he came to hunt for food, as he had yet to take his dinner.. but unfortunately, she was scheduled to work alone that nite... she felt a pang of disappointment as why he hadn't turn up earlier while there's still another staff to guard the shop, so that she could have the chance of having dinner with him now.. so unfortunate.. so wrongly the timing it was...

When he knew she could not leave the shop, he started to leave.. he need to get his dinner fast, so that he could get back to the office soonest possible.. she was hoping to say good bye to him when he started to step out of the shop but a walk-in customer appeared from the entrance and walked straight to her for her assistance.. now she can't even say good bye to him, but juz keep looking as he walked away, his back on her.. but as she was showing the customer the newest promotion items on the rack, she saw him turning his head and looked at her?thud! Another skipping sound of her heart, butterfly in her stomach and making her blushing like a beetroot! She was still looking at him as he turned back and continued his way down the main road.. and after he was on the other side of the road, he halted for a moment and stared into the shop.. looking at her again.. a few times, before he disappear down towards the direction of shops down the road...
She felt ill with excitement and that she could hardly concentrate on her customer.. but alas, the customer went off happily with her purchases after a few minutes...

***
She had been standing by the glass window since the customer left the shop.. looking out at the opposite road, longing to see PC walk by again.. she was hoping that he will use the same way to get back to his car, but all she saw was the view of a road with lots of cars strolling by...

***
She stood by the window and waited for almost half and hour.. only then she realized that he should be on his way back to the office already.. now she understood, she felt it.. the feeling of waiting for someone that will not come...

Posted at Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Wonderful World of Bi-atching. Bienvenue!

Bitchy bitchy fights! I found this page in the Cleo Mag January edition.. haha... can't help but have to take a picture of this page... i think this idea may sound abnormal, but the truth is, women i acquainted with, felt really thrill at the idea of being known as "Bi-atch".. (talking bout trends today..)
Honestly speaking, I feel damn good to admit I'm a bitch! U have to have the possession of skillful techniques to be labeled as a bitch! Frankly, yea! Call me crazy, maybe i'm insane.. but the idea of being recognized as a bi-atch is damn exciting.. haha..for me, bi-atching, oppppssss, bitching is perfectly normal for a girl.. crazy or not, it's up to individuality.. hey.. no everyone can bitch.. not everyone has the quality..I feel pround to be a B.I.T.C.H... welcome to the wonderful world of Bi-atching, gals!

King (of Kong)

Just watched this last nite at the cinema... quite cool.. I remember the first time I watched the old version of King Kong was in ..izzit 1983? I dunno.. but I think most probably I was 3 or 4 years old then?it's been so long I couldn't recall exactly the story line of this blockbuster.. except the scene where Kong held Annie Darrow in his humongous palm, like a child holding her Barbie.. the one where it stood on the Empire State skyscraper and thumping both his fist on his chest to show that he is the King (of Kong) that could do anything to protect his beloved Ann! haha.. as a child while watching the old version, wut made the show interesting was the beast itself.. but last nite, after I watched the ending of it, I was surprise that I nearly cried.. for King Kong.. where he was looking at Ann Darrow before he fell from the Empire State building and died for good.. yea.. he's a beast.. ugly face and all..but.. I sympathize him, for he became the prey of human greed, as a tool to turn a man into a millionaire overnite and he fall for that trap becuz of beauty.. fuuhhh ... poor guy! haha..but it was a good 3-hour show.. I would put it as entertaining..
Posted at Saturday, January 07, 2006

Massage Massage...
My newest toy at home.. isn't my mom cool to get this thing for us?!! (tis the most useful gadget she got for this household in the last 20 years! :p) It feels damn good to sit in it after a long day's work… no more back ache days! Yayy!!

Heart-Sick..
I'm really tired of ppl going on and beating around the bush! It's a real shame when you love someone and that someone juz uses some lame excuses to shake you off... a stupid idiot confessed that he loves a gal very much, but can't promise her anything, therefore, better leave her alone... but he never try to understand that the gal needs neither big money nor luxuries from him.. she only need him to be by her side... why is he so selfish and self-oriented? if he thinks that leaving her will make her future better, then let me assure him that he's making an enermous mistake...
it makes me sad when i try to convince him that he meant the world to her and all he could say is 'sorry'...
let me tell you YJH, she don't need your apology, she just need you... if you say u loves her so much, I'm really having doubts on you.. whether u are a prankster that loves to play games with her heart... you psycho!
all in all, I believe Cupid is doing the wrong job with his arrows... shooting at the wrong pair most of the time...it's pathetic..

A heart-sickening MSN session...

YJH: i just can say,is wat she wan to do we just can sokong loh
[520 = PC]=?! says: oh..go to hell! you are the one making her go away...i had once a very happy fren, wif a happy looks and happy smile on her face! until u came along and spoil it all! y are u doing this to her if u really loves her, you shud have been by her side and not leaving her like dat! you spoil her life.. u spoil everything! sokong ! damn you sokong!
[520 = PC]=?! says: maybe u think i'm very rude to you.. yes! i'm very rude becuz i hate you doing this to my fren.. after a while i realized dat we can trust you to treat her good..but at last.. u still leave her and do this to her!! wut u think is rite for her is not rite at all!
[520 = PC]=?! says: u r so selfish.. u only think of ur own feelings! did u ever ask her how she feels.. do u really understand she needed you more than anything?! u only think of ur own pride!
[520 = PC]=! says: i'm sorry if wut i said now offends you! but i think it serves u rite!
[520 = PC]=! says: u r slowly killing her..if u keep on doing this to her...
[520 = PC]=?! says: u r going to kill my fren...
YJH: sorry
[520 = PC]=?! says: u don sorry me.. u sorry to her larr.. she's ur gal..not me!


PC520Latte

PC520 Latte! Dated on 10/12/2005… … there's always a story behind everything… even a li'l cup of latte… it makes me real stupefied..and ashamed, to admit…on why such a tiny little gesture could set my heart thumping against my chest ever so fast that, I'm like having a heart attack! My heart juz simply skip a beat when I saw this li'l cup of latte on my table… (it looks terrible, i noe... cuz it's been drank half of it...)




The Other Woman
A phrase that I found quite interestingly true, not a bit doubtful about the writer's opinion of the differences between being a man's wife and being his "the other woman"..namely, the mistress (did i hear someone said 'bitch'?)"The other woman sees only the virtues. She sees the romantic hideaways & the expensive little dinners for two & she's so thrilled if he can ever stay the whole night that she doesn't even notice that he snores or his feet smell or he takes up the whole bed. everything about him is exciting----even his faults---because she's never sure when---or if---she's going to be able to see him again. It's all very--- dramatic. Very high tragedy"--->phrase extracted from The Other Woman, by Joy Fielding

The Talisman
Good book… good, good book… Couldn’t put this book down.. it was so capturing that I spent the last 3 nights speeding up my reading, straining my sleepy eyes and adjusting my tired mind to concentrate on this book…atmleast up to 330am in the morning.. This book’s a craze! It casts a spell to the reader so that he/she could not have the will to let go of it before you simply reach “the Conclusion”… oh my…
A real true heart-warming journey of an intelligent 12-year-old boy… (It startle me to know how much heroism there can be in a 12-year-old boy, juz to save his fucking dying mother..), and yes, it’s just a story but it did plant some thoughts on me about virtues one should have…should possess.. should act upon.. for those who like fantasy and terrifying tales, you bet this is a good read.. tremendously recommended…

New York Daily News'A classic…a journey to rival the greatest adventure stories ever told…rare and dazzling'

Break break, Work Work
Back to work.. back to work... shuck!... after a 4 days leave break... feeling lazy... and it kills my back after uploading a few cartons of wine into the car (always had been a sure occurance after few days away from work...) wondering how long can my back survive before it's gonna go "crack, crack crack, and crack" and can never be vertical again... "puuiiiiii"... hopefully it won't.. keeping my finger crossed...Had a very good holiday at least.. not much rest... but still, it's away from work..kinda refreshing..hehe... manage to finish up the "Secret Garden" ... now juz started another Stephen King's thriller..halfway thru, very difficult to put it down, fascinating... too excited to stop reading it, hopefully able to finish reading it by this weekend... hopefully, hopefully....Work's starting to get busy with year end shitty tasks and the Season's Greetings coming 'round the corner..(sux!) but eventually tiz da best time to get that bonus fatten up bit more...hahaha... Schedule shows that need to work on the Eve and on the Christmas day... but hey.. wut's da big deal... i dont really party anymore... getting old.... feeling the body harden up and the bones creeking.. haha .. no.. juz exaggerating...but it's true, not much party nowadays.. feelling too tired to bother, couping with all day's work..(how i miss college days *sob-sob*), most of time, the head occupied with hallucinations, matters from the heart, all the unnecessaries...letting all energies strained to the maximum...to perfect waste! how stupid.. but can't control it..That's why larr..preferably resting at home on day offs... or go some quiet shopping... or have some cuppa wif ji muiz or frens... or else, my all time favs... zzzzZzzzZZzzz... snoring my way to slumber land... ahhh... feeling tired already...snooze...end of story...
Posted at Friday, December 02, 2005

Pay Less Books
Was having my day off yesterday... cool day it was too.. juz the perfect weather to stay in, have a cuppa in the garden, take up reading a book or the newspaper...but unfortunately, that was not what i did..*sigh*...Had been fetching my ah po from the temple, sent her home, went out and do some shopping with my ah yi at Giant superstore..then went to HUKM to buy my ah po's medicine... aiii....a typical day off dat doesn't allow you to "off" completely... reach home at around 330pm... *ffuuhhhh*... there, half of the day was gone juz like dat...
But i did find something interesting at the superstore though... a nice bookstore which sells second-hand english books! Alrite, i know there are lots of such store elsewhere but this one is near my place... so there, i can go as often as i can =) .
Books sitting on racks in MPH, Popular, Kinokuniya, Borders, etc... are quite expensive.. not to everyone of course, but at least, to me it is...(ehemm), especially those authored by international best writers... but hey, lucky me to have a second-hand book store so near..hehe...
It may be a second-hand store, but you can find quite a selection of best selling books here, including Stephen King's, Jefferey Archer's, John Grisham's, Anne Rice's & etc...etc...cool! and in good conditions too! You can even find forgotten classics like "the secret garden", "the good wives" (sequel to "the little woman"), Enid Blyton's work and many more! see, see.. it makes me so excited to start talking bout books! lurve it! If only i could have a library full of books, i wouldn't mind spending everyday reading them! (but of cuz need to fork out some time for my astro drama series as well larrr... :þ)okie, anyway, you can find quite a handsome selection of useful books there too, like those self-improvement books, children books, self-learning books, reference books, cook books...If you're interested...and happens to stay near Tmn Connaught, why not pay a visit to "Pay Less Book" bookstore, located at the Giant Superstore, Southwalk...(next to Cosway)... Happy browsing!